Hot Take : Boundaries

There is nobody who gets more punished than the person who is not afraid to be upfront about their boundaries, whether from those who seek to undermine the boundaries they set with them or those who are too cowardly to be upfront about their true feelings about that person.

Frankly speaking, I'd rather be on the receiving end of somebody, irrespective of how unreasonable the reason seems in my POV, that is not afraid to be upfront about how they don't see a future in a (platonic or even non-platonic) connection with me, but wishes me well than somebody whose too cowardly to do so, who eventually shows their true colors in the face of me being desperate for an answer from them, whether in the form of a text or about how they'd feel about me and them.

Nobody is more fake than the person who thinks optics makes them a good person, where they can't admit to themselves that they're too shallow and that's why they don't see a future in a connection with you. Therefore, I have more respect for the person who owns up to the fact that they're shallow than a pseudo-good person who thinks that they're a good person because they think "All cops are bad" while they operate with the same lack of integrity that they say cops don't have.

In the same fold, I don't understand how grown adults don't operate with this mentality, where they'd rather force their young relative who doesn't want to be around them to be around them than to accept their need for distance, especially if they verbalize it. If I was made to not feel good enough to where I attached to and tolerated somebody who had no respect for me, especially as their actions show, it's because of the adults in my life who thought I was not good enough to have boundaries respected.

It's because of adults in my life who devalued my emotions and feelings, which makes it not a surprise that I attached to people who essentially were emotionally unavailable and put me in a state of emotional torture, where I was unworthy of having my needs met (connection) because of how constantly I was conditioned to feel like my other needs weren't worthy of being fulfilled (safety).