Stuck between Alexandria & Bay Area

My partner and I are moving out of Orlando after living here for 4 years (we are originally from the Chicagoland area and Northwestern WI). While we both loved the Midwest, we wanted to try somewhere new and I was deeply affected by the extensive and brutal winters we've had up there. I always thought I was a summer/autumn person until I moved down here, lol.

We have narrowed down the places to Alexandria/DMV area or the Bay Area, which are both expensive and means once we move to one, we probably can't afford to move very far again for another year or 2. We also have to make a decision quickly, as our lease is up in a few months.

I'll put more info down below for anyone who would care to read it, but the summary of things most important to us about the move are:

  1. Politics (I'm bi and my partner is trans)
  2. We are both very outdoorsy and would like to camp and hike a lot, and have access to mountains, lakes, forests, and the ocean
  3. COL: I'm aware these places are both expensive, but they are currently our options due to my partners job (I work at the theme parks in Orlando in customer Relations and have an educational background in design). The bay area is technically more expensive, but we would have a roommate there as a friend of ours also wants to live there
  4. Access to a city's amenities - we are pretty spoiled with fun things to do here in Orlando like theme parks, concerts, museums, good food, etc.
  5. Public Transportation: Since they both have good public transportation, my partner is willing to travel up to an hour and a half for their commute one way.
  6. Friends/community: we plan on joining local clubs to meet new people, but coming from the Midwest we are pretty used to people being really friendly and taking care of each other and want to know which city (if either) is better for this?

More information for anyone who thinks it would be helpful:

I'm going to be completely honest: we moved to Florida in the first place bc we couldn't afford California. I'm fully aware of how beautiful the nature here is and I hope Floridians aren't offended by this. I'm just one of those people that has wanted to live in California most of my life, but am now very concerned about the wildfires and COL horror stories. My partner also likes California, but isn't too worried about this stuff.

The hardest part about CA vs VA is that it's so far and expensive to visit back home: my family does yearly trips up to the WI peninsula Door County, and if you're not familiar it's an amazing place; think Cape cod meets the North woods, and perfect little small touristy towns. The PNW reminds me of it a lot, but super sized. Honestly if we did the bay area for a couple years, it would be cool to slowly move up the coast to OR, but I would just be nervous about S.A.D. with all the rain.

Thanks for reading, and any insight or tips are appreciated :)