Husband says he temporarily emotionally checked out but wants me to wait Hello,

Hello,

So my husband and I have been married almost 5years. He is military and is currently in the military's physician assistant program in Texas while I and out little one remained in NY where we lived before he had to leave for Texas. Our marriage was fine initially but then inlaw drama from his family and a few other things caused me to loose respect for him and I took him for granted for a while and just wasn't necessary the ideal wife I wanted to be when we got married. Anyways, fast forward to two months ago when my mom died and I didn't have emotional support from him mostly due to the distance, I suggested to him we temporarily separate and he agreed. However at the end of that phone call I immediately regretted what I said but I guess damage was already done because he said he was so hurt that he decided to check out of the marriage and focus on his school program until he graduates next fall. He says he's no longer in love with me and it will take time for it to come back. He then suggested we be friends or pursue a legal separation with intent to reconcile when he's back in NY.

My issue now is that he typically visits home every month or so and it's so confusing to me when he visits and we're in the same bedroom, we have sex and interact with each other like everything is normal, except he won't say I love you and then when he goes back to Texas it's pretty much radio silence unless we're talking about the kid. I don't know how to turn my emotions on when he's around and then off when he's gone unless I emotionally check out as well. I'm in therapy to fix my own issues but it's like I'm in marriage limbo cos he wants me to wait until he's back in NY before hes emotionally available again. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice?