‘NoFap’ is Toxic and Harmful- A Professional’s Experience
Pardon me if this turns into a bit of a rant, but it’s rapidly becoming a topic that merits both my attention and my speaking up as a clinical professional. Feedback is welcome, but blind criticism from adherents won’t be heard. Confirmation bias is real, boys.
I work as a clinical hypnotherapist; you could say that I have come to specialize in men’s sexual health and wellness. My work sees my speaking to many different men from all across the world and allows me the absolute joy of helping those men get back to who they want to be. It is a gift and I am truly grateful.
There is something that often comes up in my talks with men and my wandering online: the ‘nofap’ movement and its associated belief systems, organizations and adherents, always quick to prey upon men in need. If it’s not clear already, I consider this whole method and mindset to be negative on the whole, but I’d like to take a moment to clearly explain why in hopes of saving someone out there some pain. I will undoubtedly have some pushback in the comments, but I’ve never let that stop me from adding my voice.
Sometimes in response to sexual dysfunction, porn addiction or various other issues, men will stumble upon this idea in their search for answers. Its followers will loudly cry that the answer to your problems is simple: You don’t have to address what’s actually going on with you, just stop jacking off and all will be well. Trust me, bro. It’s been 4983 days for me, bro. The followers of this idea tend to be very vocal, supportive of anyone who thinks like them and quick to attack anyone who remotely disagrees with a storm of uncomfortable information about their mastubatory habits, uncited claims and aforementioned ‘bros’.
The fact of the matter is that the movement is hurting people. Sure, you will get a ‘success’ story now and again, but you will get the same amount of positive result from nearly anything, regardless of harm. I’m not going to go into the numerous negative effects of the practice, I’ll let the collection cited at the end of this do that for me. I am going to speak on my professional opinion and experience working directly with folks dealing with a problem. Even for all the negative aspects of it, my primary issue is really quite simple.
It avoids the issue. It’s an attempt to ignore the causes of addiction and dysfunction by simply abstaining from touching yourself. To be quite blunt: Not jacking off isn’t going to change the psychological factor that caused a porn addiction or dysfunction. It will, more than likely, worsen it and create a new host of problems with your thinking. Addiction and psychogenic dysfunction is resolved by discovering the root cause, the event or association which created the problem in the first place. All not masturbating does is allow one an excuse to ignore these things and the chorus of men determined to make everyone as miserable as them will ring loud in their echo chambers.
You want to overcome this issue? Do the work. Speak to a professional and do the work needed to help you to where you want to be. It’s hard, sure. It costs money, as most professional services do… but it works. There’s no fucking about with tormenting yourself for extended periods. Do it the right way, right away. I help men each and every day overcome these underlying issues and it is a far, far more dependable route than a scapegoat.
I know dealing with these problems is tough, but keep your head up. Help is out there and it doesn’t require joining a pseudo cult to obtain. If you have any questions, I will be happy to answer, but I do ask that you refrain from medical and medication related questions as they are out of my professional scope. Have a wonderful day, boys.