I've decided to cancel my top surgery

I made a post on my old account about considering cancelling top surgery because of my weight, anxiety around results, etc. One of the stipulations is that I get a sleep study. Which I did last night. I have sleep apnea. No idea whether it's moderate/severe/etc but I need a CPAP machine.

I just feel very bad about myself and have decided if I can't/won't lose this weight, I dont' deserve surgery. Someone else can have that spot. I would bet money that my sleep apnea is a direct cause of my obesity. It sucks, but that's reality. Considering my leg and are so fucked up I won't likely ever be able to work on a nursing unit, surgery doesn't matter much anymore. I'll work from home and stay in the house like I've been doing for 3 years now.