AITA for telling my boyfriend not to invite his ex to our anniversary dinner?

I (29F) have been in a relationship with my boyfriend, Jake (31M), for three years. We usually celebrate our anniversary with a small dinner with our closest friends and family—a tradition we both cherish. This year, however, Jake decided to mix things up by planning an “all-inclusive” dinner party to commemorate our relationship. Everything was going well until I found out that he had also invited his ex, Sarah.

Now, let me clarify: Jake and Sarah broke up over two years ago, and he claims they’ve remained “just friends.” But to me, our anniversary is a celebration of us, and having someone from his romantic past there feels like a disregard for our relationship. When I brought it up, I explained that her presence made me uncomfortable and sent mixed signals about how our relationship is valued. I suggested that maybe we could plan a separate get-together with her another time, but he insisted that she’s an important part of his past and should be welcome at the celebration.

The night of the dinner was tense from the start. I tried to enjoy the evening, but I ended up leaving early because I couldn’t shake the feeling that the event wasn’t really about us. Since then, some of our mutual friends have reached out, calling me controlling and insecure. They say I should trust him and that it’s really not a big deal.

I still feel that my feelings are valid. I’m just trying to set healthy boundaries about what I consider appropriate for celebrating our relationship. So, AITA for telling Jake not to invite Sarah to our anniversary dinner?